Guijoada

In an extraordinary turn of events, I started cooking. My fancy settled on the Feijoada, which is a dish from Brazil I really loved. Why wait to be in the US to start doing this? Because the US are a country of immigration and supermarkets (locally known as grocery stores) have a great choice of food from all over the world. It's pretty obvious to well-traveled people, however the most Eurocentrists among you might be surprised there is much, much more to US cuisine than McDonalds'.

Anyhow, I found the recipe and I started cooking and I then I felt compelled to improvise a bit, hereby creating the first Guijoada in the history of mankind.

The Feijoada is a black bean stew that you pour on top of some flour compound.
I didn't have that, so I replaced it with rice.

The idea is simple: Let black beans simmer for 2 hours and drop marinated ham hocks in there. Then serve it with farofa, some flour-based compound. I didn't have either farofa or ham hocks, so I replaced them with rice and pan-fried sausage respectively. It's quicker to do and it's just as good to the palate.

It was a resounding success: the dish was empty, the police said none of the deaths could be attributed to me and I still have all my fingers in spite of some intense chopping.